People leaving churches is understandable. Sometimes it’s good for them and sometimes it’s even good for the church. I’ve never thought everyone should be happy at one church, options are good.

I get it when people leave a church I’m pastoring. I’m often fine with it even.

Except when they leave over something that didn’t even happen.

Now, I will grant the point that people who leave over things that didn’t even happen are generally not very helpful members of the church to begin with. They are people who are looking for an excuse to leave, so they make something up so they feel better about leaving.

I get why certain kinds of people do this. It’s still highly irritating though.

There are three examples I remember that top the list for people leaving over things that never happened.

The first was a couple who left because in a sermon I told them they couldn’t raise their hands during singing.

Get this, not only did I never say this, they never once raised their hands while singing before or after I allegedly said this! I was a young pastor at the time and this was the first time this imaginary offense thing happened to me. Blew me away.

The second was a mother who left because I told her that her kids couldn’t take Communion. Again, I never said this. I remember the conversation. I’ve had multiple parents ask me if they should let their kids take Communion. My answer is always the same:

“I don’t know. You’re their parents. Do you think they understand the Gospel and what’s going on with the bread and the cup? If you think they understand it, then let them do it. If you don’t think they understand it, then don’t let them.”

This sounds reasonable to me. Apparently she heard this as me saying “No! Do not let your kids take Communion in my church, sweetheart!”

The third one was a lady who left because we didn’t like single mothers, so we alienated her and didn’t support her. This one Is just, I don’t know. Here’s my main sticking point: She was married the entire time she was at our church! I remember this because her husband was huge and fit and played outfield on our church softball team and was awesome!

But apparently totally reveling in having her husband on our church softball team was too much for her single-motherness to handle, so she left.

I don’t know. I get it and at the same time do not get it at all.

I hope the next time a person who wants to leave my church and is just waiting for a reason to leave, just asks me. I can give you about 21 reasons to leave our church. There’s no need to make stuff up.

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