Although I have enjoyed making fun of and complaining about and whining about and being cynical about pastoral ministry for years, I have to say, my years as a pastor were one of the best things that ever happened to me.
I consider it all to be a giant blessing and honor.
Before I get too uncharacteristically carried away in positivity, let me say that I did not feel this way during most of my years in ministry! There were brutal days. I was swallowed up in deep depression for years.
The struggles were real. The lack of money was real. The pressure to please people was real. The humiliation and disrespect were real. It was all real and felt horrible.
But over time, especially now that I’m out, the clarity of hindsight has shown me what a great thing all the misery was. Tribulation works patience, experience, and hope, and hope does not make ashamed.
It’s through those tough times that I lost confidence in myself and was driven to God’s Word, the Holy Spirit, and the comfort of my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.
If those terrible things had never happened, if everything had gone well instead, I fear to think of what my spiritual state would be today.
I was not equipped to handle success as a young man. I know I would have become a massively arrogant jerk. I would have been one of those fallen pastors we enjoy posting about on Twitter. I needed to be cut down. Being a pastor in the church I was in cut me down very well.
Paul says in 1 Timothy 1:12-14:
I thank him who has given me strength, Christ Jesus our Lord, because he judged me faithful, appointing me to his service, though formerly I was a blasphemer, persecutor, and insolent opponent. But I received mercy because I had acted ignorantly in unbelief, and the grace of our Lord overflowed for me with the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus.
I don’t claim to be appointed like Paul was. I had no Damascus Road experience with my ministry spelled out for me. Nor can I claim my past life was the result of ignorance in unbelief.
I grew up in a pastor’s family. We had Bibles everywhere. My ignorance was entirely due to laziness and self-righteousness. It wasn’t until that was beaten out of me and I was driven to the Word for lack of other options, did I start to become less ignorant.
Now I can give thanks to the Lord for the opportunity I had to serve Him, as flawed and pathetic as it seemed to be. It was an honor to teach God’s people from God’s Word. I should have been more grateful during it.
The Lord is the ultimate judge of our ministry. Endeavor to please Him, never forgetting that we do the job to serve Him. It’s not for the pay, the prestige, the respect, the power, the influence, or any number of other possible candidates that drive people into pastoral ministry.
It’s to serve our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. What an honor and privilege it is.
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If you’d like to hear more details about my depressing experiences pastoring my church, I wrote a book. CLICK HERE to get a copy of it. There are 9 tips for how to not grow your church for only $3.50!
Failing Pastor 